Being an accommodating, nice person = good. Worrying about people liking you and not stepping on any toes at the expense of your own happiness and desires = not good. You can’t please everyone — embrace that that’s 100% OK this year.
Not only will this give you an amazing retrospective of 2016 come next year, but writing down the amazing things that happen to you when they happen works as a great gratitude exercise day to day. Find out how to make a perfect rememberlutions jar
The new year is a time where you inevitably take stock of your life and how you’re doing — and you probably wind up thinking things like, “I should be healthier, I should be nicer, I should…” etc., etc.
. “It causes us to engage in behaviors that are completely against what we want. Instead, replace ‘should’ with ‘I would like.’” Check it out: I would like to be healthier. I would like to stop spending so much time on my phone. I would like to go to bed at a decent-ish hour…
Every time you have the impulse to punish or insult yourself, get in the habit of asking, “Would I do this to my best friend?” Or whoever you think deserves to be treated with the utmost compassion and respect — aka exactly how you deserve to be treated, too.
Anyone can benefit from therapy, so whether you’re already seeing a therapist that you’re lukewarm about or want to start therapy for the first time, make the first step to find one that you really click with. If you don’t know where to start, check out
One of two things inevitably happen when you say “yes” to things you don’t want to do — either you do them at the expense of your own happiness or you make excuses and flake later at the expense of your relationships. Don’t do that. Be gracious and polite, sure, but look out for yourself. “No” is a complete sentence.
Not only does it make you an unpleasant person to be around in general, but also complaining = ruminating in negative thoughts. And ruminating in negative thoughts takes a big toll on your mental health in the long run. Don’t hold stuff in, by any means, but make an effort to express those negative thoughts once and move on.
What does sleep have to do with mental health? Pretty much everything. Lack of sleep can seriously magnify feelings of unhappiness or depression and anxiety — so treat your body right. Your mind will thank you.
This year, every time you find yourself comparing yourself negatively to someone else, remind yourself of three things you’re totally kickass at. Either that, or put a dollar in a jar. You’ll kick the habit pretty quickly.
Carve out time once a week or month to date yourself. Take yourself out to dinner and a movie or go exploring around your city. Learn to be comfortable spending time alone. Learn to love your own company.
We tend to hold on to negative thoughts a lot stronger than positive ones, so expressing gratitude before you get out of bed in the morning is a small, effective way to get on the right path and to connect with happier thoughts.
People put their happiest selves forward on social media — relationships, vacations, work brags, etc. — which makes it easy to wind up feeling like shit about your own life. Concentrate more on the IRL and watch your mental well-being improve.
It takes a lot of courage to open up and be vulnerable. If you keep your struggles to yourself because you don’t want to be a burden, think you should be able to handle your shit on your own, or are just plain nervous, make this the year you create the support system you deserve. Promise yourself that whenever things are hard, you’ll reach out to at least one person who loves and cares about you.